Just heard from Cycle Surgery. They've heard back from Trek who say that a new frame will be too much bother, seeing as how my bike was made back in the days when the Starship Enterprise was still considered fairly modern. So they want to give me a whole one of these instead:

Now I just need to pick up an old frame, shove all the bits that I've got in the garden shed onto it, and we'll become an 8-bike family (yes, I know there are only 4 of us - sad, isn't it?).

B-)

(2 of our bikes are in Devon, btw)